Background:
I shifted to my current home in 2014, I was 11 then. I had a crush on my downstairs neighbour. Same age as me. We played a lot as kids. I was intimidated because she was a topper and I was not (I didn't study). We lost touch as we went to higher grades. Then she went to USA for medical school.
Fast forward to Holi 2026. I hadn't played holi since 6-7 years as I usually looked funny after colours don't go easily. But this holi, someone knocked on my bedroom door, I opened it and it was her. She took me to play holi. I played after a long time. We got in touch. We exchanged numbers and socials. The crush was refreshed in my mind. We talked frequently on text, many times past 2 am. She was preparing for an exam. Once while texting she asked me why I was still single and why I wasn't dating anyone. How would I tell her the truth? So I said never found the perfect time. She asked if I liked someone, I said yes, the one I like lives in the same locality, childhood friend but not in the same school (i was talking about her only). She asked multiple probing questions about it again.
We used to play badminton every night after holi, often till 1 am. I have good equations with her family, especially her younger siblings and uncle since she lives in a joint family. I asked if I could take another dolo 650 after 1 as my headache is too much (she's a doctor and my headache wasn't actually there). She said no, come down I will give you an ibuprofen. So I went. She was in open hair, I wanted to give a compliment there, but didn't want her family to hear. So after "taking medicine" and taking a nap at my home, I messaged her that I wanted to tell you that time but due to headache I couldn't, you were looking good in open hair (i might have done a blunder, ik). I never have been in a relationship so idk what to say. She said thank you and said if your headache was there how did your brain work then for this. I said I had just a few braincells working in headache, so I thought why not use them for a good thing (i realise how i might have screwed up). Btw I also cooked for her once, her favourite dish since I am a wonderful cook. She loved it and compliment me many times on that.
I fear that I am somehow screwing this up and life is scrutinizing me for this. Advice is welcome on how do I tackle this situation strategically so no more f*** ups happen and what else can I do to nudge this situation in a more positive direction.