WIBTA if I ask boyfriend for home alone time
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Hello Reddit!
Been struggling with a situation and looking for feedback.
Little bit of context:
Have been in a relationship for 4 years with my boyfriend (gay couple, both in our 30s) and we've lived together for 2.
Both of us work from home twice a week ( same days) and in office 3 days a week. I've tried to switch one of my days so I could atleast have a work from home day alone but my work won't allow me.
Our relationship is really quite good, we get along well, have similar interests for the most part. The only thing is, I definitely am a bit more active and social out of the house ( I go to the gym, run club, volunteer in the neighborhood etc) and my in office work days are a bit longer and more time out of the house given the nature of my work and commute.
On weekends the boyfriend and I usually spend basically the whole weekend together, with some exceptions. I'll usually try to fit in a run or gym time in for an hour or two depending on our plans(so sort of me time, but not alone time since out in public around others).
My boyfriend on the other hand genuinely rarely leaves the house besides his in office work days and for social events with me. He prefers home workouts, and generally more just hanging out at home, cooking, reading, tv etc. And during the days he works in office we leave the house about the same time but he'll get home 2 hours or so before me. Because of this he gets a decent chunk of alone time post work at home and some time on weekends home alone ( when I'm at gym or running). He seems to enjoy this time and often spends it on video calls with his family and stuff.
Zero exaggerating here, I've had maybe less than 10 hours total at home alone in the two years we've lived with each other. Genuinely was just a few situations where he had some coworker or friend who wanted to coffee on a weekend or something on occasion that he'll go to.
Prior to living with each other we both lived on our own and I enjoyed those nights home alone on occasion where you can truly turn your brain off, not be social and just zone out a bit. I just don't really get any of that anymore. In two years I've genuinely not walked home to an empty quiet house after a day of work to just sit and decompress alone for a bit. Don't get me wrong it's awesome for the most part coming home to a partner! But I didn't realize not having any alone time at home ever is stressful in a different way.
I know it's a shared house between us now and I hate the idea of asking my boyfriend to spend some time out of the house but I'm also going a little bit crazy not having any time home alone ever.
I'm not trying to be vague or hint to him, I think it would probably be good if he did something in person ( yoga class etc) where he could meet friends and socialize and spend time out of the house but I also want to be careful not to try to change someone. He does seem super eager to socialize with me the second I get home which does hint to me he's maybe missing out on some social outlets.
Anyhow, would I be the asshole if I ask him to try to find something out of the house on occasion to allow me to have that occasional alone time to decompress. I don't want the alone time for any wrong or bad reasons. Genuinely just want to turn off my brain a bit or occasionally have some privacy for calls and stuff with my own family.