AITA for going behind by fathers back and contacting my mother, after no contact
I’m a minor if that’s important
So here’s the context behind the reason for me having gone no contact with my bio mom since a year ago. The biggest reason for it was after a big fight that has been going on since I was 10. The fight was,or IS about my mothers husband not liking me and pushing me out of the family(out right saying I’m not apart of their family) which forced me to chose between two options. a, leave all my family and friends and move across the country to live with my dad, or b, go through the system.
I chose a, even if it was hard to leave all my family, friends and overall support system I packed my bags and moved to my father.
During the process of moving my dad was having problems himself with his love life and housing situation so it was taking a bit of time to fully know if I was even able to move in with him at the time. It worked out in the end, but while it was still unclear my mother and stepfather was feeding me lies and saying all types of degrading things about me and my father. I don’t rember all of them (I try to not think abt this all) but here’s some of the shit they told me: “your dad don’t love you”, “he doesn’t want you”.
It hurt, of course it did. But I knew better than to listen to them, and moved as soon as my father figured it out. I might be dumb, but I’m not stupid enough to doubt my father’s love for me.
I hadn’t gone no contact the first half year of me living with my father, the reason for that was because I still wanted to see my sweet little sister. I might not like he father- but I love her above all else, she’s the sweetest little girl there is, the angel in that hell hole.
But not even my love for her kept me strong enough to be able to spend a weekend once a month down there.
When the fight really escalated was after a snow mattress accident that ended with me in the hospital, my mother was called and informed before the injuries were diagnosed, want to know what her response to hearing her child fading out and in unconsciousness was?; ”Don’t even think for a second that I’m going to drive 3 whole hours up there! Do you know the gas prices for that?”
Yeah. I’m fine btw, it was just a concussion, I still had to be in the hospital for a while.
I hadn’t really expected she’d be there, but it was still a part of me that wished she were.
But back to the beginning of the post, as I said, I contacted her again. But behind my fathers back. I began speaking with her after a year of zero contact, of getting better with his help. I even meet up with her on a family event she hosted! I did that knowing about my fathers fears. I’m basically just spitting on him at this point. And guilt ate me up, I told him, he was disappointed. I can’t even look him in the eye without feeling shame. He’s bearly home now, coming home every other day late at night to help clean the apartment and leave groceries. What should I do? How can I fix this?