u/I_DO_ANIMAL_THINGS

I'm serious. Dead serious. I have a tissue issue.

I have always kept a box of tissues in my cars. Somehow there's always been a convenient place to keep a box.

I haven't figured out a solution for my Mach E.

I'm trying to avoid buying small travel packs of tissues if possible.

Those of you who live my snotty pain, what do you do?

Thank you.

THE NAME OF THE GAME IS ACCRETIVE ACQUISITION.

Berkshire Hathaway did it to get Geico.

Disney did it to get Pixar.

Facebook did it to get Instagram.

Google did it to get YouTube.

Exxon did it to get Mobile.

GameStop is not going to print shares to the open market. That's a standard public offering dilution. Your slice of GameStop got smaller, you got nothing to show for it. You lose.

GameStop is going to print more shares to use in exchange for acquiring another company. Your slice of one company got smaller, but that company just acquired another company and you own both. You win.

A normal public offering is basically:

Give us money and we’ll print more shares.

That can absolutely hurt shareholders if the company just burns the cash on nonsense, executive bonuses, bad investments, or trying to survive another year.

An ACCRETIVE ACQUISITION is different.

ACCRETIVE ACQUISITION is:

Instead of asking investors for cash, we’re using our shares to buy another company.

So yes, there are now more shares in existence. Your percentage ownership gets smaller. But the company itself is now bigger because it owns another business too.

⭐People get way too focused on the number of shares and completely ignore what those shares bought.⭐

If a company doubles its share count but also acquires a massively profitable business, shareholders may actually come out ahead because the total company became far more valuable.

Simple example:

You own 1% of a company worth $1 billion.

Your stake is worth $10 million.

The company issues more shares to buy another company worth $2 billion.

Now maybe your ownership drops from 1% to 0.7%.

People scream:

“Dilution! We’re dead!”

The company is now worth way more than before because it owns both businesses.

Your smaller percentage of a much larger company can still be worth more money.

Also a friendly welcome and hello to all these brand new fElLoW iNvEsToRs who just showed up in the past 48 hours with their opinions 😂

Yes MOASS. Yes Shorts never closed. I'm balls deep and unshakable.

Yes to DVF and RC and all the shit y'all get hyped about.

But also: With how vocal Ryan has been about the bullshit that happens in C-Suites, I want to be clear I am also excited about my investment fucking the status quo.

I think a lot of people my age that grew up in the 80s and 90s are just fucking tired.

We watched corporations slowly turn everything into a scam. Products got shittier. Customer service disappeared. Jobs became less stable. Housing became insane. Everything turned into subscriptions, data collection, planned obsolescence, and endless corporate optimization designed to squeeze every last dollar out of all of us.

Meanwhile executives and financial media act like everything is healthy and thriving while regular people are sitting here wondering why life feels harder despite technology supposedly making everything “better.”

The whole thing feels fake now. Financial news feels fake. Corporate PR feels fake. Social media feels fake. Half these CEOs feel like they were grown in a lab to say absolutely nothing while collecting $40 million bonuses after laying off 8,000 people. I'm done with feeling helpless.

That’s why I support Ryan Cohen.

Not because I think he’s some perfect genius. He’s an idiot sometimes. But at least he seems aware that most of this corporate culture bullshit deserves to be mocked instead of worshipped.

He feels like a genuine threat to the polished executive culture that’s been hollowing out companies and sucking the life out of everything for decades. The same culture that destroys products, burns out employees, manipulates shareholders, and then pays itself absurd amounts of money for “leadership.”

To be clear, I’m invested because I want to make money. I want to get rich. I’m not pretending otherwise. But I’m also investing because I want to support somebody who seems willing to fight against the same corporate and financial media machine most of us are completely sick of.

I’m not trying to suck the guy’s dick or put him on some pedestal. If he fucks up, criticize him. Hold him accountable. But I respect that he seems shameless enough to challenge institutions that most people quietly know are full of shit but are too afraid to say it out loud.

At this point I trust a loud contrarian idiot with skin in the game more than another corporate executive hiding behind consultants, PR firms, and CNBC interviews while their company slowly turns into unrecognizable garbage.

I want my dollar financing a Corporate Assassin.

Give them fucking hell Ryan.

Stop asking for "A MiLiTaRy DiScOuNt" on your 1am purchase of Plan B.

Thank you for your service but damn.

Your chick was super hot and probably fucks better than anything else you've got but damn, again. Damn.