i can’t stop thinking im just not built for life
I’m a 18yr old in yr 12 (senior year, in american terms), and my mental health has absolutely plummeted the last few months.
I’ve always had issues w mental health, and have been diagnosed with autism and adhd. as a kid i suffered from severe arfid and agoraphobia, to the point where i couldn’t even go outside. I used to cut to manage whatever i was feeling, and attempted suicide a few times but never tried hard enough so it never worked. I’m taking a tone of antidepressants, paired with stimulants for adhd. even better, i have PMDD, which makes me feel like i want to kill myself for at least two weeks every month.
Anyway, im posting here because the older i get the more miserable i become, and i can’t help but think that people like me just aren’t meant to be alive, that im made wrong somehow and don’t function like i should. Everything feels so hard, simple things like homework, eating dinner, brushing my teeth feel like im climbing a mountain.
i don’t know really what the point of this post is lmao but if anyone has actually helpful advice (not the just go outside and play sports bs) please lmk, my life is crumbling around me and i just want to be a normal teenager