u/Hungry-Company8869

Hey, I really need advice. I’m a junior in high school, and I’ve had a crush on this guy, I’ll call him R, who’s a senior, since the beginning of the school year. Now it’s almost the end of the year and he’s graduating soon, and I feel like I’m running out of time and also overthinking everything that’s happened between us. At the start of the year, we had two classes together, third and ninth period, and in third period we were seated next to each other because of alphabetical order. That’s basically how we started talking. He was really quiet and didn’t talk to many people, especially since his friends sat in the back while he was up front next to me. I was trying to be more outgoing this year, so I made an effort to talk to him, and our interactions were honestly really nice. He was kind, helped me with assignments sometimes, and we’d have small conversations. It wasn’t anything huge, but it felt genuine to me, and that’s when I started liking him. At one point, we were doing a group activity, and later my friend told me that one of his friends was teasing him and pointing at me in that typical way, like hinting something, although I didn’t see it myself. Not long after that, I asked him if I could add him on Instagram, he said yes, but when I got home and checked, I saw he had a girlfriend. I felt really embarrassed because I genuinely didn’t know, and then shortly after adding me, he unadded me, which made it worse. Even though I felt embarrassed, I kept talking to him normally because I didn’t want things to be awkward or make it obvious I liked him. After some time, I noticed he removed his girlfriend from his Instagram, like from his highlights and everything, so I wasn’t sure if they broke up or not. Around that same time, our teacher changed our seating, and instead of sitting next to me, he sat behind me. That’s when things started to feel weird. One of his friends, I’ll call her B, started making comments in class that at first I wasn’t sure were about me, but then it became more obvious. She would say things like “go with your girlfriend” and, in Spanish, things like “look at her, she wants to kiss you” and “she really loves you,” and she said this right in front of me. Every time, he would just smile or laugh. He never denied it or said anything rude, but he also never shut it down, which confused me a lot. After that, he started acting a little different toward me. He was still nice, but more distant and kind of cold. I stopped talking to him as much and only really spoke to him if I needed help with something for class. Even then, I tried not to go out of my way. But the truth is, I still liked him. Even after everything, I would still get butterflies when I saw him, and I felt guilty because I didn’t even know if he still had a girlfriend or not. Recently, there was a band concert and he’s in band. I had asked him about it before because I wanted to go support one of my friends who was performing, but I almost didn’t go because I was worried he’d think I was going just for him. In the end, I went anyway because my friend really wanted me there. At the concert, I was cheering for my friend, and when the seniors were being recognized, I was yelling her name and my voice kept cracking, which already made me feel embarrassed. Later, my friend told me that while I was cheering, he turned around, looked at me, smiled or laughed, and said something to the guy next to him, and they both laughed while looking at me. I didn’t see it myself, but hearing that made me feel really self-conscious and worried that he was making fun of me. Now I’m just overthinking everything. I don’t know if he ever liked me, if he just thought I was annoying, or if I embarrassed myself without realizing it. I’ve also heard mixed things about him, that he’s not exactly how he seems, which makes it more confusing. He’s graduating next month, and I feel like this is my last chance to do anything, but I also don’t want to look stupid or chase someone who might not even like me. I don’t know if I should just let it go, try to talk to him one more time, or if I’ve just been reading too much into everything this whole time. Dose he even like me?!?