Am I overreacting for getting mad at my boyfriend for not being there for me when I was having a bad week?
I (23F) and my boyfriend (21M) have been together for 1 year and have moved in together.
For context I have been dancing since I was 3 years old, so for 20 years now and have been a part of a ballet company for 4 years. I also work 2 very physical jobs, ABA therapy 8:00am-2:30pm and dance teacher 3:00pm-8:45pm M-F.
I’ve been working on this ballet performance since January, (it’s now April) and it so happens to be my last ever ballet performance, I have decided to take a break from ballet due to being over worked and losing the love of preforming.
We train every Saturday 8:00am-4:30pm
It is performance week, on the last Saturday rehearsal before being at the theater all week, my shin was swollen and my leg started going numb.
I talked to the Dr that helps the dancers in the company and she told me she had to completely shut me down, concerned of a stress fracture.
The Next morning I get an email from my Director that I am pulled from the show due to my potential injury, that she needs to give the other dancers time to learn my parts. Immediately I am heartbroken, i have worked so hard on the ballet overcoming a lot of mental blocks due to being overworked and not loving what I’m doing anymore, on top of this being my last ever performance.
The next morning (Monday) my dog falls ill and I have to take her to the vet. Turns out she had an infection in her uterus and needed antibiotics immediately and surgery the next morning. She ended up spending three nights at the vet. All that time I spent that time worried about how to pay the vet bills and have to pay rent in two weeks just trying to figure something out.
All while working 8:00am-2:30pm and then having to go to the theatre 3:15pm-10:00pm. Due to my contract I have to be at every rehearsal this week.
We had three shows Friday morning, having to be at the theater 7:00am-1:00pm and then working 4:30pm-7:00pm.
I am mentally, emotionally and physically exhausted. Any time I confided in my boyfriend, telling him that I’m not okay right now, that I’m just having a bad week. His reply is always “you never have a good weeks” or “you’re always tired what is new”.
I just needed him to be there for me in that moment and he wasn’t. Making me feel bad for even complaining about how hard this week has been for me.
Tonight (Friday, the night before one of the big shows) he crossed a boundary I had set while I was sleeping, although it’s a minor things to me it’s huge due to some childhood trauma.
I got a little mad at him, snapping at him for crossing the boundary I set. On top of being upset about my week and this situation, I told him he wasn’t there for me when I needed him, to which he replied “it’s just the girl who cried wolf, how am I supposed to know what is serious and what’s not”.
All I needed was somewhere to support me, and help me through this week. Maybe I should have dealt with my problems on my own, not relying on him to be there for me and to help me through some of the heart break I’m having this week. He was just the one person I needed and him being my boyfriend I expected him to be that person.
Am I overreacting for getting mad at him for not being there for me?