we’re arguing over this, I (M19) was texting my sister (F23) this morning. my gf (F21) saw me do this and asks me who i’m texting, I tell her my sister. bear in mind she obviously knows I speak it and my family is from there and that I would speak it with my sister in person.
She asks me what the messages say, at this point there’s nothing up at all I don’t mind her asking since it just seems out of curiosity. I tell her what the message i’m sending says and what my sister sent. she then says she doesn’t like that she can’t read what im texting people and it gives her trust issues. I was like okay im sorry for that. I didn’t know how to respond because I don’t think i’m doing anything wrong.
I told her I’d never do anything behind her back I don’t text any non relative girls so she hasn’t got anything to worry about. (For context my girlfriend has been cheated on in a previous relationship so looking at it that’s probably where these trust issues come from) She said that I could just do it in english and it’s weird that I don’t. I was thinking ?? If i’m talking to my family or friends that speak it we’re naturally going to speak in our native language. She says I could be talking to anyone about anything and she would have no idea. Which is true but it’s weird to care that much about it to imply I should start only using english, especially when i’m speaking to family. I told her that and she says my sister can speak english so I should just text/call her in it.
I said that’s controlling as hell and an insane way to think in a relationship, to which she got upset and said shes just trying to make sure that nothing can go on. I told her I understand her trust issues but to demand I only speak in english to my own friends and family is controlling and it feels toxic. She was crying and I didn’t like to see that and I’m thinking it’s possible I overreacted and I shouldn’t have insulted what she’s saying the way I did.