Hi all,
My bf 29 and I 25 Have been together for almost 3 years now + 1 year of friendship.
He a very kind and considerate man, who’s always taken care of me in a practical manner. His love language is definitely actions, and he makes my life feel easier. Long term, I know that living with him will be so easy, as I’ll never have to nag about chores and he’ll put my comforts before his, and I love this about him.
But, he is not romantic at all, and I thought I could get over it as all the other qualities are amazing, yet there’s a part of me that keeps feeling unfulfilled. I’ve communicated to him numerous times on what I would love to feel a bit more romance - i.e flowers once a month, more physical affection, thoughtful messages in cards ect, and despite giving very specific things as I know he’ll struggle coming up with them, he will do them once and then never again. I find myself having to constantly ask everytime even tho I explicitly said flowers once a month would make me feel loved - and he agreed he would do it - and here I am, 5 months later, no flowers yet.
Its making me feel like my romantic needs are not a priority to him, and we even broke up over this a few months ago. When I gave it a second chance, I noticed he put a tonne of effort the first few months, but now its pretty much gone back to the way it was, and i’m back to feeling unfulfilled.
My brain keeps pulling me either direction, that I should just accept the way he is and know that he’s loving me in his own way, and the other side is saying I will always feel a void forever if I ignore my needs, and I can find a better match.
Truly confused on what to do. Has anyone been in a similar situation or has advice?