So I(21F) was on vacation and i was visiting my older sister (24F) and the whole 13-14 days we just hung out and cooked together etc...It was my last night there and we planned to go clubbing...
My sister was also kinda new to the place and had no idea where we could go. So she calls up this guy let's call him N (25M). They had hooked up multiple times before and had some emotional connection(like sharing some sorrow stories & stuff). "They cared for each other" (as told by him).
He came to our place and we all pre gamed (as alcohols expensive). I was kinda getting my make up done when he came and I felt he's eyes on me the whole time but I chose to ignore him...My sis was entertaining him so---
We called a cab and got in. But the thing is my sis took the shotgun and N & I , we sat at the back ...This was very unexpected as i thought my sis would be with me. We went to the club & I literally had the best clubbing experience everrr.
After we returned N was supposed to stay for the rest of the night ...We all were hungry so we ordered Mcd & shyte, we were really drunk , so we lay down on the bed 3 of us...Again my sis chooses to put him in the middle.When I went to fetch the order they were kissing and stopped when I entered. I really thought of him as a big brother cuz he felt really safe & comfortable. They were not but seemed like a couple. So I was very free with him and all. After dinner I waited outside in the kitchen ( I had no problem doing that cuz I understand) while they had sex.
They finished their job my sis comes to call me back inside but idk why she couldn't find me. Then N comes cuz my sis was all tired & sleepy...We kinda had a moment but again I ignored...We went back inside to sleep...N was in the middle nd suddenly he strikes up a convo .I get very emotional when drunk so I kinda open up...he kept saying he couldn't hear me and we got really close..Idk why I couldn't sense but we were really close...he was brushing the hair out of my face, i didn't like it & said "please stop" but he kept doing it..Then suddenly he starts making out with me ...I was resisting but couldn't much bcuz I didn't hv energy...he wasn't stopping...
I got up nd left the room...he followed me to the kitchen..and he lifted me and made me sit on the kitchen counter where we made out again, while I was saying"I don't think we should do this" etc...He said okay let's go back & i will not do anything..we went back and then again everything started, he whispered "I know we both want it" ...at that point I gave in, we made out, had sex...when I was in top of him I saw my sis beside him & i panicked..we went to the washroom & continued. I didn't want it but I felt like I have to ---I was doing everything he demanded while saying "we shouldn't do this"...After that we again came back to bed...he starts kissing me and I just was so mad at myself that how tf could I do this...in between I tired to stop this multiple times but he kept ignoring me.
He was trying to convince me that it's okay and my sis wouldn't know also making sure i wasn't mad at him for doing this etc...mind you I was a virgin.
My sis doesn't know, she was passed out the whole time...but in the morning she asked when did u & N come to bed last night...
It's really difficult to face my sister...idk what to do...AITAH?
English is not my first language so there are a lot of grammatical mistakes.