[TLDR: I’m a former PD who can’t get a good job while less experienced people are getting those jobs, and I don’t know what to do.]
I was a state PD for over 6 years across a couple localities. I was making good money and generally well-situated, but was getting too burnt out and had very little chance of advancing. I left to join a small firm where I could still do criminal work. It’s on a payment structure with a lower salary but potential bonuses to make up for it.
At first it was great. My workload was miniscule compared to what it had been and I felt really refreshed. I liked the attorneys I worked with and found the new work interesting to learn. I was able to adjust my budget to accommodate for the smaller paychecks. I got onto the federal court-appointed list and started working on federal cases, which I liked a lot. Everything seemed to be heading in the right direction.
Fast forward 18 months and everything is stagnant. I’ve grown to really dislike the civil work we do and can’t motivate myself to care about it. Unfortunately that’s where the bonus money is calculated from, so my bonus isn’t making up for the wage difference like I expected. I like the criminal work I have, but feel like I shouldn’t spend as much time on it because of the money. I also can’t take on some bigger cases due to a lack of support staff. Another issue is that my supervisor is very disorganized and hard to communicate with. At times I feel like I can’t trust him to keep up with our case requirements, which makes me worry about missing something that could impact my license too.
A few months ago I decided to change course. I have been looking and applying to other jobs for the last 6 months. Problem is that I can’t find another job that pays well or that I feel qualified for. I’m focused on my current region due to my family situation, but have looked as far as a couple hours away too. I feel like I took a step back for this job, and everything attainable I see is another step back. Anything that would be progress is out of reach. The search is stressing me out as much as work used to.
To make matters worse, I recently learned I did not get considered for a local FPD job. As in I didn’t even get an interview despite working with them a few times over the last year on CJA cases. Adding insult to injury, an old friend of mine from the state office did get an interview. He was hired at my old office after me. The only thing I can see that would make him a better candidate is a clerkship he had pre-PD, but I actually have federal court litigation experience where he has none. This was also shortly after not being selected for a job with the local legal aid office that I thought would be a great fit.
To say it’s disheartening is an understatement. Really, it’s the latest in a long line of failed applications. But the FPD spot was one I really wanted. And I didn’t even get an interview. It will likely be years before another spot opens in that office.
I don’t know what to do. I’ve watched old colleagues with less experience get jobs I would love. Previous PD interns have jobs I want. I know I’m a good attorney, but it feels like the opposite every day. I make pathetic money for an 8th year lawyer, and it feels like I’m stuck.
Any advice?