I wasn't expecting how few people cared about me.
Just a little sad rant here.
I'm almost 33. With wife for 15 years before she left me; no kids which certainly makes things way easier.
She had an emotional affair ("hopefully" only) with some tech bro in his twenties. We still live together by necessity, still have to watch her leave to see him multiple times per week. I know this is her boyfriend. It sucks. I am counting down the days until I save enough money to move out.
As this was happening I was starting a new career. It was so incredibly stressful and still is. I don't currently own a car and the job is a 2 hour commute by public transit. It's a weird blessing though, having to be out of the house for 60+ hours per week, so that's been good at least.
I knew the divorce was coming after I suspected the affair, but what really caught me off guard was how little of a support network I had to lean on. I have family and friends who love me, but they just quietly watch and let me suffer.
No reaching out and asking how I am doing, no offering support in any way. I thought we were so tight, but I guess I was wrong. Just the usual "I'm sorry that happened", or whatever.
It makes me feel so unlovable. I was thinking about moving to the middle of nowhere for a while. My career is in health care so I could live literally most places in the country where there is a hospital. I have been really hesitating on doing that because I didn't want to be so far away from my friends and family.
And even now still, even when I feel so unloved and ignored by everyone, I still don't want to move away because I don't want to make my friends and family sad. But why should I even be worrying about that when they aren't helping me right now?
Feeling very confused. Shit sucks.