Reality check on FB post
My husband and I are expecting our first child in the fall. This will be the first grandchild on both sides and everyone is understandably excited. We recently shared an announcement on social media after taking some time to inform those closest to us of our news in person. Neither me or my husband post much on social media but there are some family members and friends we wanted to inform that we don't regularly speak to.
My Mil loves facebook and all the attention that she can get from likes on her posts. She shares and reposts anything she can and has crossed several boundaries with it. When dh and I got engaged she wrote this long post about it framing it like she was overly involved in the situation, all of her friends commented congratulating her which irritated me. Dh and I had made our own post together for that. When dh graduated she also made a long post about how she was sad she couldn't share pictures because he decided not to walk at graduation but was just such a proud mom, again everyone congratulated her and not dh. And more recently, a close friend of ours passed very tragically. It was extremely sad and my dh and I were both very impacted by the loss of someone we had known for 20 years. Mil had never met our friend but made a post on facebook directed at his family and wrote about how much mothers love their sons and she just can't imagine the loss. It felt very self centered and like she was trying to insert herself into others very real greif. Again, all her friends commented how sorry they were for her loss.
So now that we've posted our announcement, she has predictably reached out to me and asked to share it. While I appreciate her asking first, I can't help but be bothered by her trying to be the center of attention once again. My dh has made a fair point that it's her grandchild and her facebook and she's allowed to be excited and share whatever she wants, but he does understand my frustration.
I feel that anyone that needs to know our news is on our friends list and has already seen the post. I don't know all of her random facebook friends and am a generally private person. Her profile settings might not be as restricted as mine ( I have family members that harassed me growing up that I am no longer in contact with that I don't want knowing about my life. I have them blocked and everything set to private but once she posts who knows who sees it). I know nothing on the internet is 100%private anymore but I just don't like my life being posted on someone elses page.
Another factor is that we don't want any pictures of our child posted online once they're born. I need her to respect that rule and not try to guilt trip us by pulling the " proud grandma" card.
How should I tactfully respond to her text? Part of me says I shouldn't care so much but my overprotectiveness of my baby and my boundaries feels very important. Am I being overdramatic because of past occurrences and should just let her share but warn her now about not posting anything else in the future?