AITA for trying to balance my boyfriend moving in with me and my current roommate’s situation, leading to tension between all of us?
I (27F) and my boyfriend (29M) planned to move in together after his rental was sold. I felt good about this decision overall, but there’s been a complication with my current roommate (22F).
We’ve had ongoing issues and don’t get along well. Before my boyfriend and I decided to move in together, I was already considering asking her to start looking for another place. I own the home and could end the arrangement, but I’ve been trying to be considerate of her situation as she has financial stress and no local family or friends.
Because of that, my boyfriend and I agreed to give her extra time, about a couple of months max, with reduced rent while all three of us would be living here temporarily during the transition.
Since then, there have been several requests on her end regarding space and logistics, including her asking to have a friend stay over the weekend before my boyfriend moves in and wanting a final solo weekend in the house. I’ve tried to communicate with both of them and find compromises, but it’s resulted in tension on all sides and me feeling stuck in the middle.
I’ve also been open with my boyfriend about feeling anxious about the three of us living together during this period, which I think has unintentionally made him feel uncomfortable or unwelcome.
The situation has escalated to the point where my boyfriend is now considering finding a separate apartment because he feels unwanted.
I’m honestly feeling overwhelmed trying to balance being fair to my roommate while also supporting my boyfriend during a big transition, and I can’t tell if I’ve handled this situation poorly or if it’s just an inherently difficult setup.
AITA?
Edit:
to add some context, she had about a month notice that he’s moving in, and we’re heavily subsidizing her rent (paying 2/3rd her portion) with the hope she can just save up for two months and won’t end up living in her car. I know it’s not my responsibility to care about her, but I still feel stressed about kicking someone out knowing they don’t have a lot of options.
The laws where I live is that she is an occupant, not a tenant, so legally I’m only required to give her 30 days, I just knew that wouldn’t be enough time for her to get her shit together