u/Goldengirl_1977

Just curious what other GenXers here have tried to either conceal or improve thin/fine hair and if any of those things worked for you.

I am in my late 40s and up until I was about 17 or so, I had very thick, long hair until I lost a considerable amount of weight -- about 35 pounds — in a very short amount of time the summer before my junior year of high school. Back then, fat-free everything was all the rage and dietary fat was being condemned. I took things a little too far with the fat-free nonsense and because of that and the quick weight loss, I got too thin and began shedding a lot of hair.

My mom was concerned and took me to my pediatrician, who also referred me to an endocrinologist. I also saw our family dermatologist, a second dermatologist and went to one of the local hospitals where all of the dermatologists in our city were having their monthly meeting. I sat in a little room while they all filed in and took turns examining my scalp. I underwent several rounds of bloodwork plus a scalp biopsy, none of which determined anything conclusive.

My dermatologist then decided that it was androgenetic alopecia even though there was no history of hair loss on either side of my family and the tests didn’t show anything unusual. I think it was just what he went with because nobody could find anything abnormal on the bloodwork or scalp analysis. None of the many doctors I saw during that time seemed to think the fat-free diet and quick weight loss had anything to do with it, either, which I found - and still do find - very strange. Also, I was not at an age where androgenetic alopecia typically sets in.

I was prescribed Rogaine, which wasn’t yet OTC, and also Nioxin shampoo. Gave both a shot and after several months of not seeing any change, I quit. Having to apply the Rogaine daily got tedious fast and it made my scalp itch so much that I couldn’t take it anymore.

Since then, I’ve just had to manage as best I can with thickening shampoos, volumizing sprays and concealing fiber powders like Toppik.

I’ve also gone back periodically to check thyroid and the other usual suspects for hair loss in women and again, doctors didn’t seem to think anything was amiss on the labwork even though this last time, my serum ferritin level was one or two points away from being in the below-normal lab range.

I have read many times that serum ferritin should be much, much higher in order for hair to grow/regrow or stay healthy, but since the lab said it’s “normal,” then the Dr. wasn’t willing to do or prescribe anything. I’ve also asked about supplements and whether stress might also be playing a role, but was pooh-poohed on those suggestions, too.

At this point, I am frustrated. It’s been over 30 years and my hair has never gone back to what it once was and I doubt it ever will. Doctors haven’t been much help and I would like to find something to make it look at least a little bit better or grow a little thicker.

Has anyone had any success with supplements like Nutrafol, biotin or those hair/skin/nails formulas? Or those red laser light brushes and caps?

And has anyone tried those clip-in extensions or “toppers” and liked them? If so, are there any brands you would recommend?

I’ve vented on here before about being dreadfully lonely and not having a strong support system in my life. Both of my parents have passed away, I am single and do not have children despite always wanting them very much, and I am estranged from both older siblings - one by choice and one not.

I’ve really struggled with finding and making friends at this age (late 40s), as it seems most of my peers are married or otherwise in relationships and many also have kids. They all seem to have many other longtime friendships already and only seem interested in doing “couple” things or “mom/dad” things with others in the same boat. Even when it’s something like a girls’ night out, the only women included are those who are married and/or have children. When I reach out, I get little to no response and am rarely, if ever, included in plans.

I’ve tried to “get out there more,” as people are so fond of suggesting, but wherever I go or whatever I do - classes, gym, clubs, church, etc. - people already have their own little established groups within and don’t seem to want or have the room to include one more person. No matter how friendly and engaging I try to be, it never goes beyond the initial, surface-level pleasantries.

I never thought I would be this lonely at any age, but I spend the majority of my time alone now and it really hurts.

About 6 months ago, a couple of former co-workers and I started meeting up for walks on Saturday mornings, but those meetups have been fairly inconsistent, often with one or the other co-worker being unable to go or having some last-minute reason for backing out.

Whenever we have managed to meet up for walks, it‘s been a really nice time and we usually stop at Starbucks afterward for a drink and a chat. I so look forward to those walks because it’s about the only social interaction I get anymore, but they have been few and far between these past several months.

More recently, both friends have become extra flaky and I’m considering giving up on meeting with them altogether. I’m always the one initiating plans and reaching out to see if they’re available the following weekend for a walk, which they say they are, but when Friday evening or Saturday morning rolls around, one inevitably will cancel at the last minute and the other usually follows suit.

These friends rarely reach out or initiate, if at all, and I am tired of being the one to do it only to be canceled on at the last minute. It’s usually an excuse of knee pain, a cold or some other ailment, or, for the one friend, she “forgot” they were going to do_______, or “forgot” her teenager had some dance recital or other event going on.

I know schedules can get hectic, people have a lot going on and yes, sometimes they do catch a cold or whatever, but with both of these “friends,” the last-minute flake-outs and excuses seem excessive at this point and I’m starting to question whether it’s even worth it to reach out anymore. I’ve never expressed any disappointment to either of them about it and when I get the inevitable “I have a cold” or whatever excuse, I just reply back with a cheery “Feel better!” or something positive, such as wishing their teenager well with the dance recital.

Would you all give up on these friends if thngs were as one-sided as they have been for me lately? And would it be terribly childish of me to be unavailable if by some chance one or the other friend were the one to reach out next time to make plans? I doubt they would, but at this point, I’m tired of being the only one making an effort and always being flaked on.