Dear You,
I was cleaning up my TikTok today—unfollowing people I don’t personally know, fixing my feed, even deleting some of my old, cringey videos. I didn’t expect to find anything that would stir something in me again.
But then I saw one of the videos I once dedicated to you.
It’s been four years, yet somehow, it still felt like yesterday.
Out of curiosity, I visited your profile.
And then I saw her—your wife.
I thought I could handle it. I really did.
But the moment I saw you together, something in me broke again.
I felt sla sharp pain in my chest, like being stabbed over and over in the same place I thought had already healed.
It’s strange how you can still have that effect on me after all this time.
I thought I had moved on. I thought I was okay.
But now I know… maybe I’m not, at least not completely.
I know it was my choice to look.
I opened a door I should have left closed.
And yet, what hurts the most is realizing that even now,
a part of me still feels this way.
Because i don't know why and how we stayed together for years. And yet, it only took you four months with her to decide she was the one.
Four months to give her the forever I once dreamed of with you.
But I do know this—
you were once my greatest love,
and somehow, you still carry the weight of my greatest heartache.
Love Always,
~