u/GeeArr7

Hi there,

I’m an introvert, and been in a job for over two years now. I’m very quiet, will make basic pleasantries but other than that I really struggle to push myself to do the following:

1. Ask questions - I can blunt end conversations so much because I don’t feel like I care enough to learn about others
2. Talk to more than 1-2-1. I’m okay in those individual situations but throw more people I completely curl up
3. Meet new people. One of my friends has tried more than once to invite me to lunch with others and I always get anxiety and chicken out.
4. Not care, as much, about how I’m perceived. I constantly wonder how I look in conversations, if my flaws are obvious, how I laugh, how my hair is styled, do I say enough

Any guidance to break these barriers and come out of my shell more would make me much happier and build meaningful relationships and hopefully some friendships.

It would also allow me to become less intense with my actual friends (mentioned in another post)

I’m tired, both mentally and physically of how I am and want to break these social barriers my mind has set up.

Thank you

Hey,

So I have a work friend that I get on well with, so much so we used to hang out regularly during the work day and also in recent months met up outside of work a couple of times. However they are far more sociable, have a far wider circle and are also now busy at work.

I'm introverted, same work level with a far smaller circle.

Today I apologised to them as I was getting intense over hanging out, they were all cool and fine with this and said no need but there definitely was.

So I don't ruin this friendship, what can I do to take steps to understand work is not a social club, this person does not owe me all there time and such. Do I dial back chat on the work system, keep things light and don't keep asking to hang out?

Thanks