I'm a bit embarrassed because I just posted the most cringe, clueless, ignorant and idealistic "save America 101" on the teenagers Reddit community-
I don't know how to function as a person or cope with strong emotions provoked by my own trauma or the state of the world right now. All the adults won't stop insisting I'm some smart, perfect teenager when I'm CLEARLY STUPID- I intend on looking into any geography and history and current world stuff I possibly can because other teenagers seem to know and I'm just so ignorant in comparison -_-
Thanks to covid, my parents doing a bunch of moving back and forth between states while being in a relationship strain ruined the mental health of me and my siblings, gave me abandonment issues, and I missed 3rd 4th 6th and 7th grade, and I RARELY showed up to school during 8th grade while all the adults brushed off my obvious mental distress because I managed to pull through and pass every class..
I missed so much info on how to be a person :c
My point is, I don't know anything about Jack, and yet I desperately want to "fix" the world because people suffering makes me sad.
I don't know how to be a friend, a girl, a sister, a person..
All I know is how to be a "good" student. I've only ever been a delight that quietly behaves and conforms out of anxiety.
Most adults in my life, wether they admit it or not, will only shallowly regard me as some "perfect" girl, some gifted prodigy that can't truly struggle or be allowed to stress or despair.
I need an adult that will actually be there in my life. School teachers are cool and all but I can't safely get enough time to speak with them without getting emails sent to my councilor or missing my bus again. Councilors and school therapists need parental consent, and my parents WON'T consent because they think they know everything and that I don't need help. (While simultaneously not helping themselves..)
In addition to my despair, literally every close family member I have falls under this ignorant "oh she's so smart and sweet" emotional neglect archetype. Wether they raised my parents and family members to behave this way or they ARE the effected family. (Uncles and aunts)
I'M SO EMBARRASSED. What's the point if I can't even behave like normal people?