Found evidence of multiple rando affairs…[30s F/M]
TLDR; I [32F] just discovered my fiancée [38M] was making hearty attempts and probably cheated on me many many times with Craigslist randos like 10 years ago - as well as sexy emailing his Xwife that he swore was crazy and that we haven’t been able to get to stop contacting him for damn near 20 years.
Let’s paint the picture here…
We’ve been together for 13 years and have 4 kids - not married because “it’s just a piece of paper.” We moved cross country to help work and support his family’s long time business 11-12ish years ago…I was looking for some older business paperwork today and found dozens of emails sent from him (name and pictures included so there’s no denying it’s him) responding to W4M Craigslist ads actively seeking NSA hookups. He even specifically calls out that he’s married and can’t host in some of them. The emails I stumbled upon span from just before baby #2’s first bday (including day of) until I was about 6 months preggo with baby #3.
The emails explicitly asking for nudes and dirty talking with his Xwife are seriously dated Dec 26th of that year.
I feel disgusted and horrified that I didn’t see this back then. As if it couldn’t get worse, I feel like the seeking strange emails only stopped because in between kids #3 and #4 he convinced me opening the relationship would be fun...it was temporarily until I felt like more often than not I was left home with kids while he went out for fun - so to my knowledge it’s been years since we were actually “open.”
I’m sure if I keep digging I’ll find more, but if I don’t is finding supreme evidence from that long ago worth it to leave? At this point I’m the only one working to support the family, he “can’t get” a paying job. I cook, clean, manage 90% of homework and the extra curricular schedules and have at various points worked multiple jobs to continue funding his “business plans” that don't pan out. We moved back into his parents house during COVID and I work from home now, but am basically trapped here with no vehicle of my own. This really feels like a disgusting nail in the coffin, but being from 10 years ago is that wrong?