I (37F) have been with my boyfriend (47M) for over 5 years. He asked me what I wanted for my birthday, and I told him shoes, that my work shoes are probably 2 years old and starting to fall apart. This was about a month before my birthday. Fast forward to my birthday, and he and I never sat down together to pick out a pair of shoes for me. His gift to me? $110 at a local nail place. I should note that we don't have a dishwasher in our rental, and I am the one washing dishes by hand about 75% of the time.
I got annoyed at seeing the gift. I reminded him that he gave me a gift certificate a couple years ago for a mani/pedi that ended up expiring because I never once in that year had the chance to get my nails done. He told me this was a spa, so there were other things at this place. When I looked up the Google reviews, it looked like this was not even a place I wanted to go to because it seemed like all they do is nails, and only one tech seems to be good. On top of that, I reminded him that, just like Christmas, by him not getting the thing I asked for, now I am stuck spending my own money on the thing I need.
I feel somewhat guilty in being disappointed by a gift when a LOT of money was spent. Yet, it not only was not what I asked for, but it also just felt like wasted money, AND it meant that I now have to take $60 out of my own budget to pay for something unexpected. Putting things in perspective, I'm sometimes the only person he buys gifts for; I take care of buying the gifts for the kids and usually also his mom and sister. So, there are three times per year that I ask for things for myself, things I have a hard time justifying buying for whatever reason.