Broke up nearly 6 months ago (it wasn’t pretty) after a long term relationship. We really wanted to be together, but realised it wasn’t working like this. We split up after 2 months of insecurity (will they, won’t they) and a very long final talk. A week after I heard through friends they knew they never wanted the relationship again even though we both said we were hoping to see each other again after several months of reflection. I was devastated, but decided it was best to come to terms with it. The next few weeks they texted me with benign statements and useless questions. This kind of confused me as I heard they wanted to distance. Then they started showing up to the bar I work at knowing I was there. they frequented the bar, because I worked there during our relationship. I asked politely to have a conversation about what ‘needing distance’ actually meant when they clearly don’t take their own boundary seriously. They sort of engaged, but rejected me objecting to them coming to my workplace. Several months passed and I heard through the grapevine they were dealing poorly with the breakup. We exchanged some practical texts, but apart from that we rarely interacted.
About two months ago they invited me to have a conversation as they felt that there were many questions and too many loose ends. I specifically inquired what they wanted to talk about as I was not ready to have a very emotionally heavy conversation, and would rather move on then open up old wounds. They told me they wanted to ask and answer some questions about the entire situation and I said I was up for that. The conversation turned way too long and we had a genuinely nice time. They then proceeded to tell me they miss me every day, are actually still in love with me and have some delusional hope that we are still going to end up together.
After the conversation I realised I want to get back together even though they didn’t actually mention that.
The last week we have been exchanging friendly texts, but nothing more. My therapist and mutual friends tell me that I should ask her straight what the deal is and how I feel to get a definitive answer. At this point I want anyone to give me their two cents. So please….