u/Funalicious

I’ve been having a really hard time reconciling this aspect of the Old Testament and it’s really testing my faith.

It started with the fact that David and Solomon are referred to as great men despite sleeping with hundreds of women and having so many concubines. That should be frowned upon because the New Testament clearly states it’s one man and one woman. It also was Adam and just Eve and the Old Testament talks a lot about one man and one woman. So why would God call them good men when they have so many wives and concubines, especially when a lot of them are pagan?

Second, the story of Tamar and Ammon bugged me a lot. David did nothing for Tamar and it’s horrible because the culture of Israel, which is supposed to be God’s holy land, made it so that after Ammon raped Tamar, she tore the dress that indicated she was a virgin and it said she was no longer able to marry and remained desolate for life. Why would David’s household put so much pressure on the daughter’s virginity to the point there were outfits indicating that, and even if they were raped they were no longer able to marry? If David was a good man why would he allow that to happen? Why not let his daughter marry and allow her to be considered a virgin? Even if it’s culture, could he not make the culture of a religious country more moral?

Third, why do genealogies only consist of men? And when families want kids, they only mention their sons not their daughters? Why does God not value daughters as children? Isn’t it still a blessing to have daughters? Why am I less than because I’m a woman if I was born during that time?

Please help it’s making me very angry!!

EDIT: wow. I’ve never been more hurt and disregarded by the Christian community that I have been today. To be clear, I would die for Jesus in a heartbeat. I also have worked through things that have made me uncomfortable, like the fact that our whole goal and God’s goal is to glorify God and it is dying does that or living a ‘bad’ life on earth glorifies Him than so be it. I feel I’m a worse position. Who knew after I was left alone by my whole secular side of my family and raped for converting back that Christians would hurt me. I have to remember that He said it would be a hard life. I’ll keep running the race and living as morally as possible and spreading the gospel but nevertheless, I’m hurt.

I’ve just started watching this show and I am so confused what each of the standings are.

So does the emperor only have 3 concubines he sleeps with? Or are the lady in waiting also who he sleeps with? I’m very confused on concubine culture.

Also I’m already appreciating that they aren’t making it seem like it’s all that glamorous despite it being a happy toned show, it seems pretty feminist and critical of the polygamy and sexist culture!

Edit: my comment about not liking the emperor for having 100+ concubines is getting downvoted to oblivion. First off, haven’t finished the anime. Second off, the system is horrible! Does the show try to fight the system? Like does he try to make it so that the women are able to eventually leave the palace and have happy lives? Like sleeping with the emperor once then rotting there doesn’t seem nice. And I get that the eunuch’s would sometimes have relations with them but they can’t even sleep together or even have kids in the future. I get it the show doesn’t approve of it but is there any attempt to fix it?

Around 3 months ago I completely got off of 30 mg of Prozac. I was doing good on it but then about a week and a half ago my anxiety went through the roof. I had a lot of bouts of chest tightening. So I decided to get back into it. I started back on with 20 mg. Now after 3 days of being back on it, my chest is painfully aching almost the whole day. Like a painful heart attack it’s so bad. Is this normal? I know my body was good on it and I can’t remember how I felt when I first started it because I started it 10 years ago.

Please let me know!! Life is so unbearable right now!

EDIT: I don’t know if this is important but I’m on 300 mg of lamictal (mood stabler) and 25 mg of seroquel (anti-psychotic). I take the medicine for my General anxiety and Borderline Personality disorder

Lately and I have no idea why, I’ve been obsessed with idea of justice.

It all started with this anime called Vinland saga and this main evil villain who does HORRIFIC things, they show his backstory and he also is a person who hates what he does and is self loathing yet continues to do it without batting an eye. The show ends the first season with him dying but almost an honorable death, the best way a Viking can die. And it pissed me off and sent me on this week long anxiety and angry filled mess. It’s not fair to all of the people in the show that he allowed get raped, all the innocent people he murdered, and all the people he tortured that he died fighting. He even ended his life telling this kid to not be like him and to be a good man.

I couldn’t help but feel unsatisfied and wished I could watch him suffer and be tortured in the most horrific ways possible, worse than anything he did to an individual person.

This thinking started spreading to real life where I wish these people who do bad stuff are tortured, and even just hated. That man died loved and honored in the show just like so many evil people. Of those people who do horrific crimes, I don’t want them to become Christians because I want them to suffer in agony 1000x worse than what they did to others for eternity. I feel like Jonah did when God told him to save those people of Nineveh who did horrific things just as bad. I’ve been so angry and the tightening in my chest won’t go away.

What should I do to reconcile this?