I want to know if I am over reacting: Back story. I am married for a few years now and my MIL was dependent on us for awhile before we got marry until we moved far away and she went to live with her other kid. Back story is she was an deadbeat mother to my husband growing up due to drug addiction and he was put through the CPS for a long time. Got out and took care of his family. she claim she is clean for years now and she have to pay the price with her health declining being in and out the hospital constantly.
Back then when we first met she ran away to live with her other kid with all the money she sold from grandma house and spent it all when she promise my husband who was taking care of her some money to at least get him a place to stay. Few months later she call him asking to borrow money after she sold the house. But she left him almost homeless if we didn't met in time. and she only comes back around when she need a place to stay or a car ride or something. My husband eventually forgive her for it since she keep saying sorry for everything.
When we were dating, she would come sleep at my apartment since she was sleeping in a car. One day I went to work and she was still talking to his ex at that time which I don't really care much. But the reason that got me heated was that she was telling my boyfriend about his ex well being while I was at work. I told my boyfriend how I hated that and he confronted her and she hit me up to apologizes. That never sit right with me even until now because it proves that she is a snake that I could never trust.
fast forward when we was about to move she told us she was going to come get the stuff from our apartment that we could have sold but we were being nice again and waited for her until the last minute to pick it up (it was expensive furniture) which she never came so the stuff was all outside my apartment and I got fined for that since I use my name credit to get that place.
She also dump her cat for us to take care of which I love the cat. but I get so annoyed every time she try to claim or post about her cat and how much she love her pet when she never do anything for it. I have to get him vaccinated and take care of him for a long time. I felt like she want to look like the good person and plays victim every chance she gets.
when she move in with her other kid, the baby mama took their kid and ran away. Of course she blame her for everything since they got into an argument but I understood why she did what she did. She is still posting about how much she love her grandkids and how motherly she is when she is the one who ruin their relationship and refuse to move out.
The thing is she talks to my husband about saving up once she gets a job and coming to visit us. every time we talk she always tell me how sick she was but we both know that she would come rely on us again. and she was saying if I have grandkids she wants to be a grandma to them and come see them. Which I don't want her around my kids and haven't told her I'm pregnant even if she ask. She's a bad role model and I don't want my husband or my kids to be put in that environment. She is always depress, sleeping. she is in her 50's with no car and no place to stay, no money, just laying down all day.
Plus my parents is very nice and help support us through a lot and I don't want his mom to come take advantage of them since we move closer to my parents and she was already talking about going out with my family etc. my husband feel bad for her and wanted to help care for her but I don't. I think we done enough with the long list of things she was doing I can't fit in this post and we argue about her before many times.
TLDR : how should I tell my husband I don't want her around my family or me? or how do I tell her if she keep insisting to come? since its far away she would at least stay for awhile. Am I over reacting ?