What is my ghosters problem?
I need outside perspective because this genuinely makes no sense to me.
I (F) was in an 8-month long-distance relationship with a guy who’s a resident physician (I’m in the same field, so I fully understood how demanding his schedule is). Things were consistent. The day he ghosted, we literally had a normal conversation and were even talking about him visiting. Then he just… disappeared. No explanation, no closure.Once I realized what was happening, the last message I sent was: “if silence is what you want, I’ll give you that.” I then blocked him on everything and his number. The next day I noticed he had blocked me back on social media…?? Which was incredibly weird.
Fast forward 3 months later, he randomly emails me saying he’s been thinking about things and would like to talk if I’m open to it and that he hopes he hears from me soon.
There was no apology. No acknowledgment of what he did. Just “let’s talk.” I respond once saying I’ve already said everything I needed to say and if he has something of substance to say, he can say it via text as I’ve unblocked him.
And now… he’s gone again…. It’s been 4 days since i responded to that email. I also noticed he also unblocked me on all social media.
So I’m confused:
- Why reach out after months of ghosting?
- Why not start with an apology?
- Why ask to “talk” when the only thing to talk about is the fact that you ghosted me?
- And why disappear AGAIN after I actually responded?
At this point I’m not interested in reconnecting, I’m just trying to understand the behavior because it feels so inconsistent and honestly weird.
Would love to hear thoughts.