u/Frosty-Gazelle-536

I (f19) have been sexually harassed by my teacher in between 2022 and 2023 and never really coped with it. I was 15-16 at that time and didn't have any sexual experience back then. I started going to therapy, but in general I pretty much ignored the issue for many years, then I got into a relationship with a friend of mine. He didn't respect my boundaries and that only made the whole thing worse. We never had sex but did the standard 'petting' things, which I never felt fully comfortable with.
I am 19 now and freshly in a really healthy relationship. My boyfriend is very understanding and supporting in the whole coping process, but an issue I have that I really can't initiate any sexual things. I tried to tell him that he needs to 'push' me in a way, because I really want to have sex with him, I just struggle with the whole process. I am kind of torn between being horny and on the other hand being scared as fuck because the last relationship was really horrible.
I have no idea how to handle this whole thing, anyone who has tips to share?