u/Fragrant-Athlete1934

I've been curious just how many of us are out here with ideas and works all stowed away either in our minds or in our files, never to be seen by the public eye. I wanted to know how many are here going through this right now because it's been comforting to know that I'm not alone, but also sucks knowing just how many of us have brilliant ideas and works stored away out of fear. I posted not too long ago here about my feelings regarding being an artist, my fear of cancel culture, and being scrutinized.

I'm currently stuck trying to figure out how to manage this. I've been trying to get started on posting my artwork again on a brand new account to start over, but I keep being stuck on what to post now. I don't mind doing fan art, but I cannot sustain myself on posting fan art alone and would love to post about my OC's and original ideas, but I get riddled with the anxiety of "what if someone steals my ideas and I get pinned as the person who stole that person's ideas", "what if someone recognizes me from an older account that I used to post art on and somehow I actually did something horrible and will be canceled".

I dealt with a major OCD flare-up and breakdown 4 months ago in relation to something with my OC's because of someone I knew, and now it's even hard to start drawing my original ideas because of how much that event affected me and is still affecting me. I am ridden with fear of being berated, canceled, and just overall someone getting upset with me. Some moments, I just feel like an awful person and just end up feeling stuck. I know that I should probably just post anyway and push through it, but fuck. I am so afraid of everything crumbling around me, and I'm pinned as the big bad guy. I just want to share my art, open a business, and be happy with people, but so much is weighing me down. It's gotten to the point where my entire life schedule is in disorder, and I've been isolating from people on and off because I am so exhausted and afraid of just more drama and more things happening on top of what I'm already dealing with.

Overall, I'm just really feeling stuck, and my life isn't going anywhere because of these fears I have.