u/Forsaken-Sherbet-658

My husband and I (both 30's) have been married 10 years. We're both autistic and have children together. We struggle due to our communication and attachments styles being different. He's very anxiously attached and I am avoidant. It just seems really hard to make it work sometimes. He wants more intimacy and affection and I want him to be a more proactive partner and help with the mental load. How do you communicate more effectively? How do you go about making meaningful changes and not slipping into old patterns? It hard to find advice/therapy that actually works for neuro divergent couples. Any advice what makes your own marriages work