FMLA and life after.
Truth be told I don’t remember a time without my anxiety and depression. I’ve been on medication for over 18 years (42 to female) and therapy since childhood. And while I’ve exceeded at school and hold a masters the high functioning GAD and depression has kicked me to the ground. I started a FMLA 6 weeks ago and my therapist this week has not cleared me to return to work in 2 weeks. In fact he has an extension for 8 more weeks. I’m greatful I live in a state that has 20 week state program as well.
My brain is racing and I’m freaking panicking on so many levels. The worst part is it’s not over loosing my job, or not being able to go back to the management level. It’s letting people down. And ok some of loosing a damn good paycheck in this economy. Why because I’m a people pleaser, working on that.
The scary part is I have a strong family history on my paternal side of mental health issues going into crisis mode around this age and I’m so scared I’m going to be the same. Especially after reading to note submitted to HR about my inability to function as an employee. He’s right, I’ve lived in a functional freeze for months now. And being the main caregiver who my Mom during a stressful 8 months of health issues is part of it.
So my long winded question is how do you being to live life in the after? When the walls have been taken down by the catapults of life. How do you rebuild when your career is gone?