I have 2 children (ages 4 and 6yo). They are funny, smart, and active. I grew up in a very authoritarian environment with spanking as the way my parents made us compliant.
Fast forward to adulthood and my partner and I are closer to the “Good Inside” philosophy. But we are probably too permissive - too many chances before consequences perhaps. The children have chores and we do some time outs but no spanking. This doesn’t seem to be working well though. My 6yo had a terrible transition into kindergarten with many meltdowns (triggered by “not being perfect” or overwhelmed) but has shaped up after positive behavior interventions at school and home (how he earns his screen time or dessert for the day). He is doing amazingly well academically and part of gifted activities. I hoped we were out of the worst of it. But this spring, we did T-ball and he is by far the worst behaved kid on the team (crying or stomping away when he plays poorly) but he usually rallies and participates after getting himself together. As we get closer to finishing kindergarten, I feel like my children don’t behave the best and I’m ashamed that I’m letting them down. I’m worried they won’t have the resiliency to take on life.
Just a vent. Maybe spanking has a role after all?