My story :
I have been masturbating for closer to 10 yrs (25 now)
First 6 yrs no porn, only imagination of girls I liked in high school, used to masturbate for at least 2- 4 times per day.
Then came porn, First I loved the content, spent so much time on it.
In school/ clg with friends freetime we talked about sex and porn (hope you all agree this, checking out hot girls in school and clg : that was fun)
At the first yr of college I started to notice. I became very angry about small things, not interested in acting ( even to do small things , and became very lazy). Only like porn based masturbation.
Mainly found no morning erection, realized I'm becoming weak, but did not take it seriously.
Next phase: Love.
I did find an amazing partner, a 10/10 girl. Many people tried to impress her, but still she felt I was the man to love.
It was amazing, we shared a lot of emotions.
Once we tried to have sex, this was the time I noticed my erection was not firm, I tried to get erected, but it only lasted 3-5 seconds. I was not able to penetrate. ( ahh the worst feeling).
Then the next day, I watched porn and erection was normal, but I felt stiffness/ tightness in pelvic floor , thought because of yesterday constant trying pelvic muscles were tired.
Soon I realized some issues, and consulted with both an urologist and sexologist!
results: all normal, he said to not watch porn and to relax
I was not able to follow what they said, I have been trying to control, but maximum after 15-20 days I do masturbation but with porn.
Now coming to my problem:
I lost my thoughts to feel masturbation, only porn gives pleasure. I don't want to masturbate with thought but instead with porn, so I'm addicted to porn.
Next due to this my morning erection is lost for close to 1 yr. The mind can't focus, lazy, stress , anxiety ( for new relationships)
Good news: 1 month constant gym (+ occasional yoga) and did notice erection in morning, but not consistent. But yesterday due to a random reddit post, I started to feel the urge and masturbated with porn.
Share your thoughts, but here I have 3 questions
should I abstain for 90 days. ( but I tried it at the start of 2026 and failed )
after a timeline can I start with thoughts to masturbation, but I fear that stimulates me to watch porn ( since it's hard to control for a long time for me in the past while trying this way)
pelvic muscles have fatigued due to intense masturbation with porn, due to this feel pain stiffness when getting erect, frequent urination urgency , urin leak happens for a yr ( doctor results all normal) .
tried rever kegals, but after 10 days of nfap notice good improvement.