I’m tired of this.
This is going to be quite a rant, but I have to get this off my chest.
I (26m) have been addicted to porn since I was 12. I can still remember the first video I watched. I didn’t even seek it out at first, it was just sitting there open on the family computer, either from my dad or my sister.
Since then, I’ve pretty much masturbated every day for 14 years, and holy hell does it make me feel ashamed. I have felt ashamed of my body for over a decade now and it’s gotten in the way of having actual relationships.
I’m more in love with the thought of sex than actually having it, and the one time I actually came close to the real thing I couldn’t maintain an erection and I felt so embarrassed and insecure.
I’ve been taking steps to break free of this addiction, and it’s gonna take some time. I don’t know what the future holds for me, but I’m going to go through with it. I don’t want to be insecure about my body anymore, I want to feel confident in my own skin.
And I hope every other person cursed with this addiction is able to break free from it too.