Future full list ***
Some bits may sound short or riding want to keep it informative and short -ish lol
Me -
Male, 34, living in France, 3 children and 1 is heavily disabled. Ages 1,6 and 10
Ive had pppd for 2years and a bit, took a while to get it diagnosed and went through all healthcare professionals (like we all did)
I tried to just deal with it and get over it and it just lingered for months and I was lost as to why I feel like this.
My symptoms-
I am not really dizzy nor do I feel better or worse laying down. I feel slightly drunk just all day everyday non stop. My balance is ok I just feel “off” tipsy and hazy.
My baseline feeling is drunk literally every second that passes. Red face at 6pm for some reason and can’t talk to people without it getting worse. And tiredness tiredness tiredness lol
Found out what it was and started Virtual Reality therapy which was a 50 min drive each way, I literally done 3 sessions and couldn’t afford to travel like that. 3 sessions didn’t do anything for me by the way! By now my business was dropping dramatically (car detailing business) money was short and I was become heavily depressed, my wife was 4 months pregnant and struggling with the kids. The more depressed I got the more angry I got, the more angry the more my symptoms would be brutal. Whiiiiiiich would make me more angry(circle of doom)
I spent the next few weeks researching every single thing about pppd online, like some type of addict it had taken over my life by now and pppd become my identity! No one in the world other than my doctor and wife knew I had this, the reason was I told a friend or 2 and they said your dehydrated or making it up etc etc etc. That made me fuming as I knew what I felt was not that and nobody understanding me really got to me so I kept ssshhhh about it all! My depression really hit me and I started to hate driving, music, films, food my daughter’s milestones. I really got no joy from pretty much anything anymore as I didn’t want to feel drunk any damn more!
I hoped on venlafaxine 37.5mg 1nce a day and that helped for a few weeks so I upped it 1more level. Took the edge off again but started to miss doses and was getting weird brain sensations that made me become somewhat violent in my house regarding screaming and hitting stuff. I looked in the mirror and said to myself what are you going to do bro! This can’t be it like wtf is this all about. I can’t work I can’t go to peoples houses I can’t defend my family I can’t do a single fricking thing!
What followed was about 7months of pure hell for every single person In my house and I don’t think I will be able to fully forgive myself for my actions.
Wife kicked me out and back to England I went to live in the little side room at my sisters (December 20th 2025) Now I done fucked up and pppd has taken everything but my soul. I have read a million story’s and spoke to people, group chats everything and it was all just dead ends and depressing. I came across a women online who deals In these vestibular issues with a team of 2 others, I rang her and set up a meeting at my sisters, I explained every single thing and she’s said it’s a very typical case and assured me she fully understands my pain and is sorry. I felt heard! She said we must strip back to basics to the core issues, no virtual reality no group messages and no negativity.
She explained most of the stuff I knew regarding how it all works up the brain and said “the only way this gets better is YOU resetting your nervous system, that’s it nothing else! No medicine gets it gone no surgery nothing like that. I will give you all the tools to help you but only YOU can do it” it takes a long time and you must understand this.
She gave me 50mg sertraline as it has better results and easier to come off. I do some balance exercise’s in my room on my own also I have done 2 sessions of CBT
THE IMPORTANT BIT -
I talk positively to myself as I am trying to let my brain know THEIR IS NO DANGER.
PPPD recovery often isn’t about eliminating sensation first it’s about changing the brain’s relationship to sensation. What I’ve learned is this wasn’t about waiting for the sensation to disappear first. It was about changing my brain’s relationship to the sensation. The more fear, anger, and attention I gave it, the stronger it got. The more I taught my brain there was no danger, the more it slowly started calming down
I never say out loud I am having a bad day, I have had to change my whole thought process in everything I do to negate anxiety, adrenaline and fear. I do my exercise’s 2 times a day at 7/8 mins each time.
I have a seriously strict sleeping pattern that no human can snap me out of, my diet has changed as bloating makes your symptoms flare up. I run 4 times a week for 10mins to get my happy hormones going to make me think positively. I go gym 3 times a week for 1hour 15mins also.
sleep
Sertraline
Diet
Being slightly selfish regarding my sleep and not staying up late for a good time for anyone
STAY positive all day long lol
Light jog
Don’t stop doing stuff as you NEED exposure
reducing fear conditioning + breaking avoidance loops
Only you yourselve can change it, nobody can get rid of it
That’s what has helped me soo much and I feel the best I have been in just 3months. Is it still there? Yep I feel drunk typing this lol But I am not angry, my depression is fading and the symptoms are slowly going. Moving back in with my wife and kids next Tuesday. 😎 Sometimes you have to be selfish and focus on yourself! Because trust me some positives do come out of this. I am so healthy, no drink no drugs great sleep always at the gym, more positive than i ever ever ever ever was! Better relationship with god(Allah) Become a gym beast and just love life more than before, I feel like I will be untouchable when this goes with my version of me. It’s like building your own GTA character from scratch except it’s you!
Sleep
Diet (no bloating)
Basic balance exercise’s
Positivity
Meds to take the edge off
Confidence
Patience
That’s it!
I wish you all the best and you can all feel great in a matter of months. It’s not ideal but that’s the cards we been dealt with guys. It’s not the end, it’s a start of a new you just by doing the basics! You will be so mentally tough when you push through the other side you will be the best version of you!
I can’t wait for you all to get better as you will 😎❤️