I've never really felt like my mom stood up for me or protected me. Growing up, and even now, my older brother (hes 25 now, I'm 19) is physically abusive toward me, and she still doesn't do anything about it. That part doesn’t bother me as much anymore, but it's part of a bigger pattern
When I was around 15, I overheard my aunt (her sister) and her niece talking badly about us. I told my mom, and she didn't seem to care at all. I even told her I didn't want them coming to our house anymore, hit mkn7mlch nifa9 onb9a n3aml chi hed zwin wakha howa m7amlnach but she didn't take it seriously.
When I was younger, her nieces also treated me badly, and again, when I told her, she didn't react. I remember feeling really hurt and unsupported, and honestly, I still feel that way. I don't feel safe or defended by her, like she would ever be on my side.
What hurts even more is something she told me recently. When I was a kid, I told her that my dad's cousin tried to remove my diaper. She didn't do anything about it at the time. I had kind of blocked it out, but I still remember being harassed by him when I was around 4, and it wasn't just one time. That really affected me, and knowing she didn't protect me even then makes it worse
The confusing part is that I've always tried to protect her. I've defended her when people talked badly to her and once I even got into a fight with a man because he disrespected her, and i really love her
I don't know how to process all of this