u/Fit-Dot4489

I posted yesterday about my younger brother. He's in the NICU, I already have three kids at 17yo, should I take him on, etc.

As it stands I am leaning heavily towards adoption. I have a lot of love in my soul. But from a more objective standpoint, he may be better off being adopted by someone else.

I don't know how an open adoption would work as I'm not his mom legally, but if we somehow figured it out, how exactly would it be enforced?

They are legally binding in our state (NY) but apparently they aren't enforced often. And someone else pointed out that they could just move out of state.

Losing access to him is a non negotiable for me. I keep contact with my other siblings, even the one who is a danger. They're all my babies, I'm not losing any of them.

Is there any way to make sure he isn't taken from us indefinitely? Due to his trauma in utero there is a chance he will have brain damage and may not have the capacity, or independence, to find us in the future if he is seperated. If his parents choose to hide him there isn't much I can do to find him.

Thank you for any advice :)

Hi. I hope this is ok to post. I'm relatively new to posting on reddit so if there is anywhere better to ask please let me know. I figured ECE would be better than a parenting sub.

My daughter is five and has cerebral palsey & global delay, as well as severe anxiety & potential PTSD. She's in a lot of therapy (Play, PT, OT, SLP & feeding) and has recently started pre-k. We weren't going to send her this year but she has made a lot of progress and expressed wanting friends, so we transitioned her and she's currently doing half days.

A big issue we're having is her binky. She uses hers to self soothe constantly. Her SLP & OT are both in agreement that taking it away would cause more harm as she's a naturally anxious kid with a lot of fears. It's her security blanket. It doesn't hinder her speech and her jaw is not malformed, so there's no major health concerns.

She has a paci clip so she doesn't lose it, but the school have said she can't use it due to strangulation risk Another child could grab it and choke her, or steal it and choke another child. I felt like it was a bit strange but it's fine. So we ditched the clip.

But now she's putting it down and losing track of it (having another child take it? She isn't the type to just lose her binky) which is causing meltdowns to the max. She does let it drop and then it gets dirty, so it's confiscated. Her teacher isn't "permitted" to sanitize things so it's just gone. Very distressing to her. They do offer replacements, but she's very particular.

Also dealing with teasing from other students, but she isn't really aware yet.

Idfk what to do. Her therapists have both written letters saying the binky is necessary for her functionality in school, but they're saying their hands are tied.

I have another IEP meeting for Monday, but I figured while I have the reddit app accessible, why not ask? So, you know. Let me know if there's anything I should bring up. Love a good buzzword.