I (31m) have been a porn addict for around fifteen years now. I'm happily engaged to my fiance (27m) for several months now and he doesn't see anything wrong with my porn habits.
I've read a few of the posts in here already about finding love or new hobbies to occupy my time, and I do my best to occupy my time constantly. I'd like to think I have a great hold on my life comparatively. My fiancé and I go hiking with our dogs, we go on regular dates together, we workout almost daily, him and I are on a diet of healthy foods, I have friends I regularly hang out with, I'm on anti-depressants and have been thinking about going back to therapy again. I have several hobbies I enjoy, but in the woodworks, there's porn. Specially yiff. If anyone has any clues about the furry community, y'all know that yiff is everywhere.
I can't seem to shake it no matter what I do. I love my fiancé and I've talked with him about it before but he doesn't particularly care. Like, he cares, but suggests I figure out what to do on my own. Both of us are furries and most of our friends are too.
And not to sound contradictory here, but I also go to church constantly. I attend a non-denominational church and although it's from the shadows, I love going to church, I grew up in it. I don't actively participate in church, I just attend service most Sundays.
I suppose what I'm getting at here is that I have a lot that I do to occupy my time and I'm in a loving relationship both with my fiance and Jesus Christ.
I just don't know what to do. My yiff habit is constant. Every day, I'm looking on Telegram or X and there's just a constant flow of it. I hoard photos/videos that I like and organize everything to a T. It's more like an obsession at this point. I have backups of all the yiff I store and over the years, we're talking about tens of thousands of photos and videos that I'm constantly organizing into albums of either artists I like or different types of yiff. Every time I "quit" I delete myself from Telegram channels or X accounts but a few weeks later, I find myself in even more channels or following more accounts than ever before. And it's not like I can delete Telegram, it's the only form of communication I have with friends and group chats of events happening around my area.
I'm ashamed to have fallen so greatly with this habit in my walk with Christ and my relationship with my fiancé. Now here I am, looking for guidance from strangers on the internet because I can't seem to find anyone else to support me in this endeavor. If y'all have any ideas for me, its much appreciated.