AITA for being annoyed over my friend not booking a flight
AITA for being irritated my friend did not book a flight to my international wedding until 4 weeks before my wedding date? My friend, let's call her Y, is one of those people who thinks they are better than everyone else and newsflash, she's not. My fiancé and I have been planning an international wedding. This wedding has been in the works for TWO years. We did this intentionally to give everyone time to make plans, save and attend if they wanted to. We are covering lodging for all 60 guests. Hotels, airbnbs, etc. as well as drinks and meals for 3 out of the 5 days; day before, day of and day after the wedding. All the guests needed to do was book their flight to our European destination, show up, bring extra money for additional days and celebrate us on our wedding day.
Y decided that she needed to also have a destination wedding. We live in America and she decided on Mexico mere weeks before mine. Why you ask? I don't know. I understand that she can book her wedding whenever, and this is fine, but my gripe is she RSVP'd yes to my wedding knowing damn well she probably was never going to be able to afford to go because she decided she NEEDED to get married before me. Y and her husband, R, are not good with money (this is important for later) and that was a reason for a "cheaper" wedding, aka Mexico. Y made comments in the past that if we didn't go to hers, she wouldn't come to ours. I laughed it off because what else am I supposed to say to that? Well her wedding came and went and she still had not booked a flight for ours. She told me she would be booking it the weekend before her wedding. (I knew she wouldn't; it's the weekend before her wedding she is busy so I ignored it) Did not. Told me she would book it after they got back, she did not. A few weeks go by and she STILL has not booked her flight.
Y just had a destination wedding so she knows the exact stress this causes and continued to add to mine despite me telling her over and over that I am stressed over her not buying it. She did voice to me that she was tight on funds and instead of saying she could not afford it (MONTHS AGO) after paying for her own wedding, she kept pulling the string implying she was going no matter what. As a bride spending tens of thousands of dollars for this weekend for not just us, but our guests, so they can enjoy their trip with less financial stress.
Two weeks later she is proudly telling people "I still haven't booked my flight yet HAHA" as if it's a joke. Eventually A "books" said flight and tells me it's booked. I have been stressed out for weeks over this as my final numbers had already been turned in. I voice my irritation that it has taken her this long to book her flight and she tries to make it my fault that she is terrible with money. And says her finances are not like mine and somehow that is my fault? She has known about this wedding and trip for TWO years. Longer than she and R have been together. After telling Y I was irritated she waited so long, she sends me novel text messages threatening to cancel her flight, then she goes silent for a week. I don't take to threats, so you want to threaten me, play stupid games - win stupid prizes. I finally make the move to text her to see if she cancelled her flights or not. She responds that she did cancel it, a week ago, and did not have the decency to tell me. She booked a different trip that week apparently. Constantly plays the victim, decides to tell me it's my fault she now has flight credits instead of liquid cash because she waited a week to cancel. MA'AM your fault. You should've cancelled that day because again, I don't take to threats. Your financial illiteracy is not my fault.
Item to note: she kicked a girl from her wedding after finding out she did not have a room or flight booked 4 months before the wedding, but thought 4 weeks before mine was OKAY because she had told me they were financially in a tough spot after their wedding. Here's a hint, have a wedding you can afford.
So reddit, AITAH?