AITA For being upset about not being involved in my brother’s wedding??
For context I (30f) have supported my brother (32m) in anything he has wanted to do and have almost always been there for him as a fail safe option whenever he has money issues. My brother and I both went through very rough patches in our early 20’s where we were addicted to substances and for a brief went NC. Eventually when both of us got sober we ended up reconnecting, he went through a rehab program (he was deep in addiction and had been arrested) while he was in rehab if he ever needed a ride/food/clothes I was there for him (me and my husband worked in a field that allowed us to be comfortable) I even let him crash at our house on the weekends just to chill play video games and go out to eat and just enjoy life. Side note our mother who also had gotten sober lives with me after escaping an abusive relationship so him crashing with us helped us rebuild family ties that were destroyed through addiction. Helped him with selling him a vehicle me and my husband no longer used. (Trying not to do anything really hand-outish as I know how addiction works and wanted to instead offer him a hand-up) Fast forward I helped him get a job with my company which was much better than the minimum wage jobs he was working. Even helped him with paying his rent so he could make the career jump. When he moved out of the housing provided by the rehab to an apartment of his own helped him move. Eventually me and my best friend (let’s call her Meg) introduced him to her sister (let’s call her Stella)and they started dating. I would help brother by cleaning at his place and miscellaneous stuff when he fell into rough patches even as I go through a divorce and my entire life changes. He and Stella date for a few months but eventually break up. Life continues until suddenly Brother decides to start hitting on Meg (who is married and was going through a rough patch) and even goes as far as switching to her church and getting baptized (he previously told Stella she couldn’t change his religious affiliation, Meg and Stella go to the same church) well, Meg shoots him down completely and he gets back with Stella, starts bringing her to family events and after like a month back together THEY ARE GETTING MARRIED! I am happy for them even though I feel it is very rushed I keep this to myself, I have gone through a divorce and have started dating someone new I am in no place to give marriage advice but at Christmas my brother asks our shared older brother and my partner to be groomsmen. They both supportively say yes. My partner (29m) doesn’t really hangout with brother so I think it is a little weird, but again at this point I am still quiet. Months go by and I haven’t been asked to be a bridesmaid, even though Meg, Stella and I used to be very close and hung out before and even after all the relationships ups and downs that have gone on. Meg and I set up Stella and Brother. Yet neither of us were asked to be bridesmaids, I finally speak up to brother and say that it bothers me that they asked my partner to be in the wedding but haven’t really asked me. To which he replies that he doesn’t have anything to do with who Stella wants as a bridesmaid, but I should be fine with my partner being in their wedding party,
I point out to him that women can be on the grooms side as a grooms women (I grew up with 5 brothers and I am not super feminine) to which he tells me he really only wants men on his side
AITA for feeling hurt for being excluded from all this and feeling like they shouldn’t have asked my partner to walk another female down the aisle (it’s not a jealousy thing I just feel it is more of a respect aspect)