My marriage ended because of my ex-husband's cheating with his current wife. We had a 4 year old, 3 year old and 6 month old together at that time. He didn't want to work on things anymore than I did by then. Our divorce was not amicable but I have worked on being civil for my children's sake. My ex-husband's family and I have remained on good terms and I'm actually godmother to three of his nieces and nephews and I'm still Aunt C to the family.
This bothers his wife and it has since the very beginning but his family has said I am the mother of his children and I was around for a long time and I have established a family relationship with each of them. My ex-husband suggested his new wife could take over being godmother and then the relationship could end between me and them but that didn't happen.
My children enjoy seeing me get along with their father's side of the family. They don't really have any family on my side and it doesn't feel like that as much because I'm still considered part of the family by my former ILs. I love it too because I had such a good relationship with them all.
For a year now my ex and his wife have been actively trying to have children together and she has had three back to back miscarriages. The last miscarriage happened days before the birthday of one of my godchildren. I was at the party as was my ex and his wife. She became inconsolable about an hour in because of my presence and the fact she has not been fully accepted into the family. Apparently it was already hard to see me getting along so well with my ex's family and my godchild/the birthday child. But then she claims seeing my kids happy to see me and talking and cuddling with me sent her over the edge because it was like she wasn't my ex's wife and I was still married to him and nothing had changed.
My children don't have a close relationship with her. She doesn't get cuddles or the excitement I get or my ex gets, although he gets less because he hasn't been as present for our kids for the last couple of years.
This enraged my ex-husband because he insisted that I need to be left out in the future and his family said no. They said he could choose not to come if his wife doesn't like it but I will be invited every time and they will hope I accept every time. He raged at me for going when I knew she had the third miscarriage as well. This wasn't in front of the children for those wondering. We exchanged some harsh words because I asked him why I would give that much consideration to his wife's feelings when we know she never considered mine when she agreed to become the other woman.
AITAH?