I’m here seeking support/guidance from someone who may have experience here.
I (33F) just lost my fiancé (33M) to their mental health struggles the day after finding out they had cheated.
As much effort as I’ve put in myself to heal my BPD symptoms and be better at controlling them, this situation has pulled me straight off the rails. And I’m finding it impossible to be optimistic no matter how hard I try (and yes I am really trying - I’m attending grief groups, I’m seeing my therapist as often as my schedule allows, I’m not drinking.)
My mind is spiraling. My body is physically giving up on me. The absolute smallest dumbest things going “wrong” send me into a full on sob fest or rage fit. I’m finding no comfort in the bible/church.
I feel like I’m living through the worst BPD trigger I could have ever imagined - And I don’t know how I’m going to get through it.
Please help