I was raised in a household where you focused on school not love. So I never experienced going to a bar and talking to a guy I’m interested. Now that I’m 26 I realized how much my parents fucked up my dating life. I work in healthcare so i have a bubbly personality so I can kept a conversation. It’s actually one of my favorite compliments to get because I’ve work so hard on it. But when it comes to starting a convo or approaching or just staring(eye contact), I get scared.
Up until February I thought if you were looking around and caught someone’s eyes, they were thinking ugh, this girl is staring at me and I looked away in like a millisecond. I have now come to realized, those guys were already staring at me as I just reacted in disgust not realizing 🥲.
Anyway enough with the back story. My true problem is making eye contact. How does one look around a bar without obviously looking like they are looking to catch eyes with someone. Or is that the point and no one really cares. I’ve been told many times I’m attractive and I get asked for my number all the time while walking around ( not by my type) but when it comes to a bar I don’t have any interactions unless I start one and I know it’s the eye contact. (Atleast I think so)
So like my questions are, is it weird staring at a guy you think is cute until he looks or after 3 seconds should you just look away? How should I start off the conversation with someone I think is attractive at the bar without looking stupid. And how do you get over that fear of everyone looking at you when you walk into the room.(I always have my head down because it’s so overwhelming) I should mention I’m an extremely shy person until I can get comfortable with someone which might be 3-5 minutes. But I get all in my head and don’t know what to say.
Any tips and tricks are welcomed! Please help me.