My Daughter Is The Only Entity Keeping Me Alive…
I became a first-time mom about a year ago and I am feeling completely defeated and over life.
I couldn’t even enjoy Mother’s Day yesterday. I got super overwhelmed with negative emotions from all that has happened to me within the span of that first year— (lost a great job opportunity because I got pregnant (even though they said I wouldn’t), underwent three procedures and two major surgeries four months apart, spent those four months in chronic pain every single day, unable to physically work, burned through savings just to stay afloat and now drowning in debt)— that I spazzed out at my family, jumped in the car, and drove away for a few hours.
I hate feeling like this all the time…
Yesterday just felt like I went over the deep end and now I’m just full blown depressed. No appetite, no motivation to do anything— just want to wither away and die, but my baby is keeping me here. She’s the only entity keeping me alive at this point… but how long will that last?
I really hate feeling like this…