Long story short. I'm a full time, wfh, mom of two, 6 and younger. Their dad is the stay at home parent in this fucked up economy.
I am absolutely, undeniable stressed, depressed, anxious and all around MISERABLE. And I have been for the last 5 years. I am just burnt out from working and mom expectations. I have told my fiancee this (kids father) and I am basically told to suck it up, and do what anyone else in the world needs to do.
I work 9-5 everyday, make dinner and get the kids ready for bed. It's the same cycle every night. Once the kids are in bed I am so tired I can't stay awake to do anything else around the house. I wake up in the morning completely miserable. I am irritable to my kids and fiancee. And I see it effecting them.
Since I'm a miserable bitch, so is my fiancee. My mood effects his mood and when he's depressed all he does is lay down. Something that I do mentally everyday because I cannot physically lay down depressed everyday.
I have been wanting to die for a while now because there is no way out of this. On my days off, I am better. But when I have to work, I go back to misery. The job itself isn't the worst, but I'm still connected to my old employer so it sucks sometimes.
I need a break. I want to be the stay home parent. Its not that I don't want to work I am just EXHAUSTED. Part time I could definitely handle. But I have no choice as I'm also a homeowner and reworking the mortgage we already can't afford.
I need serious help. And I have no idea where to start or how to get it.