Is it considered cheating if my ex is entertaining somebody else less than a week after our breakup?
I don’t even know where to begin. I (18F) and my ex (18M) broke up because he thought I was cheating on him because of a video I sent to him.
Info about my ex: he gets jealous VERY easily and he would constantly think that I cheated on him, and of course as his girlfriend I always reassure him saying that I only love him and would never betray him. He was jealous of my classmate, Shawn (18M). During our 2nd year anniversary last year October while were having a picnic, he took my phone without my permission and started opening all apps, he got mad at me for being in a group chat that Shawn was in (the group chat has 3 girls including me, 1 gay, and 1 boy which is Shawn). The group chat was for group study purposes, I’m only close to 1 girl in the group. I barely talk to Shawn, and if we do talk, its only questions about a specific subject or basically just a discussion about a subject. Plus, he has a girlfriend and they are a very lovely couple. Out of respect, I left the group chat for my ex. Even if it was settled, he kept on saying that I was having fun with Shawn at school and basically assuming that I’m in love with him (not true at all). It took me a month to gain his trust back because he would always infer that im a cheater and a liar. But eventually, we were doing well after that situation.
The video was me performing a declamation piece for our college program’s competition. Since it’s a competition, of course there’s audience including my classmates. I genuinely asked my classmates to not laugh once I’m performing because I’ll lose my focus and forget my part. At the very end of the video, Shawn said “See? I didn’t laugh.” Well that guy is super unserious which is why he said that to prove he didn’t laugh. When my ex bf watched the video, he asked me if it the guy’s voice at the end of the video was Shawn’s, I said yes and also stated that I asked all of my classmates to not laugh because I would lose focus and forget my part. He simply said “I disagree because I know you’re entertaining him behind my back and for sure having fun with him after the video.” I was honestly hurt that he would say that, but I couldn’t invalidate his feelings because I also feel jealousy, but not to the extent of resenting him. I was reassuring him multiple times because I didn’t want him to overthink, but he wouldn’t listen. Days go by, he was barely saying words to me, I was still reassuring him but he thought that I was lying to him and would shut me down saying “Only talk to me when you’re not lying anymore.” I was very hurt and cried all night because of his harsh words. I was getting tired begging him to trust me, I finally had enough because our conversations were just the same and didn’t improve once, i broke up with him texting him long paragraphs of how much i love him and to continue his life peacefully without me. I also didn’t want to make our argument bigger because he has his own personal problems with his work (he’s working after we graduated senior high school) and I don’t want him to get stressed out more because of us.
Not even a week after our breakup, his friend texted me saying that my ex was talking to another girl, and the girl was whom he admired for a short time before we got together. Then 2 weeks after our breakup, his friend texted me again saying that my ex didn’t continue talking to the girl because apparently he still loved me and felt guilty of doing it. I only texted his friend thanks for the information because I don’t want to know more and get hurt a lot more. I cried after sending the text.
Was what my ex did considered cheating? I’m hurt that he called me a cheater and then proceeded to do something I never thought he would to after we broke up. Please let me know.