AITAH for thinking about how my life would be if me and my ex had gotten back together?
I (31 m, married) have a rather good relationship with my ex (28 f). We were a couple years ago for about a year, then had a bad breakup and after some months of toxic...whatever it was we went no-contact. About four years later we started talking again and slowly built a friendship based on mutual hobbies and struggles with work (same job). My wife (27) knows about her and everything that happened and my ex was invited to our wedding. So much for the background.
Last week a mutual friend of ex and me threw a birthday party and wife couldn't attend. After talking to her I went alone.
Party was fun, nothing questionable or bad happened and in the end it was the mutual friend, two other guys I didn't know and me.
One of them really liked my ex and so the topic drifted to her multiple times and in the end we landed on the time we were together. After some more talking (and alcohol) I was asked if I regret the break-up and if I miss her, to which I replied that I don't but I sometimes wonder and think about how my life would be if she and I had gotten back together.
Apparently that's a no-go because the two guys then started talking about how sad my wife must be because I'm such a bad husband and illoyal and so on.
I took it as drunken stupidity but now I'm wondering if IATAH for still kind of thinking about my ex and all that.
Hope that was understandable.
Edit: Since the topic came up and I didn't specify, my wife knows about the "what-if" thinking and she is fine with it as long as it's just some passing thoughts and not some in-depth fantasy or something like that So while her opinion is the one that matters the most to me I still wanted to know what the general opinion about these kind of those is
Edit 2: so from what I've gathered the problem was less about the thought and more about how I said it out loud...which is fair and yeah, shouldn't have said that, especially not in that situation