So me and my bf were on a FaceTime call, I was explaining to him that seeing my sister fight with her husband was giving me anxiety, and I actually might have unresolved trauma from my family. And then he told me “so your parents fight” which I denied, and I said, “ I don’t have this trauma because of my parents, I have it because of my grandparents fighting with my parents”.
So then I go on and open up about my past for about 25 minutes. It was something vulnerable, and I don’t usually share these things. I also mentioned in the end “and of course it’s not like my parents never fought, they have normal couple fights like any other couple, but nothing crazy were it would give me a trauma”.
So after when I was done, he didn’t really say much, which is fine. After two minutes later, he says “ so I was right your parents do fight” and that statement alone upsetted me because out of everything he could say,
that’s what he had to say. So I told him “are you serious right now? Is that what what’s going in your head this whole time?” and he explains “no I’m just saying that I was right earlier”
I went on and explained that I would rather want him to say nothing than say that. Since it made me feel like he was listening to me just prove himself right. Then he said “If that’s what you think”
Then I ended the call abruptly because I was genuinely upset!
I was expecting a call back but he never called me. So I messaged him and I also ended up calling him and I asked him why he didn’t call me back when he knows that I am upset? And then he tells me “why would I call you back knowing that I’m right?” and I told him “ you can clearly see that I’m upset and I’m not in the right mood for this” and he responds “ I would’ve called back if I know that I’m wrong. And you know what you were doing, and you know what I meant. You were the one who ended the call” and I explained to him he’s not understanding me, and I told him that even if he thinks that he is right, the least he could do is call me back knowing that I’m hurt, he can explain my faults later when the situation is better. But he kept on trying to prove himself right and said that why would he. And he started telling him that he’s not understanding me. And he said “why would I listen to u for 25min if I was not trying to understand you?” When I explained that I didn’t feel like u were. He kept on saying “if that’s what you think”.
We started arguing more and then in the end, he told me to reflect on my behaviour, and I said the same thing to him and ended the call.
I am honestly genuinely upset because I don’t think I’m in the wrong here because if I was him, I wouldn’t care if I am right at that moment, but if my partner is at a vulnerable moment, I would make sure they are feeling okay before I start lecturing them about who’s right and wrong.
I just need somebody to tell me that I’m not in the wrong since my bf thinks he’s right.