Hey y’all, I don’t post on Reddit a lot. But I don’t know if I should ask my ex out again.
I know, you are probably thinking “here is another guy obsessed over his ex”.
First off, it has been 5 years. 5 years ago, me and my ex split up. It was a nasty breakup. One of my friends turned on me and told lies about me being addicted to hard drugs so that he would turn me off of her so he could get with her. Well, as unbelievable as it sounds. They got together. As a matter of fact they were both my neighbors. So for a year I had to sit there and watch them be all lovey dovey in next to my street.
Anyways, it hurt me deeply.
Well now, we are both much older and mature. I see her probably twice a year. I saw her today. My roommate’s girlfriend is her new coworker and apparently she said that one a work trip this week, all she did was just talk about me and what she would have done different. She thinks I hate her. And yes, I should. She chose to be with my ex-friend even when her friends said no, she was not a good girlfriend, and she did not care about my feelings after it all ended. But no, I do not hate her. As a matter of fact, as a Christian, I am happy to say I have found it in my heart to forgive her and my ex-friend.
I don’t want to hold a grudge, and I don’t like the thought of holding something over the head of someone in a moment of a lapse of judgement.
HERE IS THE BIG TWIST. Turns out my ex-friend was a rapist. He raped about 5 girls. 3 of the five I had hung out with separately and told me their stories. My Ex was a good girl. I bet you he lied to her or never brought it up or hinted at the fact if anything. I did my own detective work and found that these girls all had similar stories. NOW, as much as I wanted to tell my ex, I didn’t. I couldn’t sit there and warn her that her new boyfriend was a “rapist” because that sounds so far fetched. She already thinks I am a liar, thinks I’m on drugs, and was a whole different person when we dated because my ex-friend had told lied that took away all of my credibility. So I never brought it up.
Now it is years later. I now find out she thinks I hate her. I just learned this tonight. I had not idea. I now learn that I sit on her mind as, and I quote “the best guy she ever dated” and someone she “would have seen a future with if she had done things differently.”
I am heavily considering maybe shooting her a text asking her to just get lunch to sit and talk about everything that happening, considering I never got the chance.
Should I?
How would I even go about it?
It is worth it?
Any insight is helpful! I hate this relationship dram shit❤️
TLDR:
I found out tonight my ex girlfriend from five years ago, who left me for my lying, rapist, manipulative friend still thinks about me and wishes she would have done things different. Do I ask her to out to talk thing back over? Maybe give things another chance?