Need advice: lonely and regretful
Assalam alaikum
Yesterday, I (25F) stopped speaking to a guy (24M) after we discussed and I realised nikkah isn't really an option for him due to his career rn (he's finishing uni rn and will start a training job prior to qualifying in his field).
I understand this is my fault. It started off with him being interested in me. We spoke as friend and then we discussed he's not ready for nikkah and we agreed to just be friends (Dec 2025). In hindsight this was a mistake because over that time my feelings developed. I know I'm wrong for this and I ask Allah forgive me, I dont need anyone to tell me.
We discussed nikkah again yesterday as he finished his exams. He said its still not an option, we had a long conversation and realised it's best to stop speaking as we both have feelings (albeit mine have now developed a lot more now and his havent) and it's not halal. Again I know this whole situation was easy to avoid & I seek Allah's forgiveness.
I just want advice on how I can deal with missing someone , i feel very lonely like a person who gave me a lot of comfort and care is now gone. How I can stop feeling inadequate that i wasn't enough for him to want to try for nikkah especially as he was the first one interested.
I just want to turn to Allah seek his forgiveness and be hopeful that there's good out there for me. I know I did wrong and really don't need anyone in the comments to tell me that, i already feel shameful and regretful, feeling worse will not help. I just want advice for what I asked for please.