My (24f) boyfriend (28m) called me controlling. He had an injury earlier in the year that left him unable to work until now and so has used the time to see more of friends and family which I understand. However he leaves on a 1-5day notice for periods of around 2nights to a week.
This upsets me greatly as we moved in together just before the accident and while I understand the want to use the time off of work to see friends and family more than anyone would have chance to working full time he is gone for around 11 days of a month and he has just returned from a trip this afternoon and plans to leave again tomorrow morning
We had an argument today about it where he told me it was controlling to be upset every time he leaves that im trying to keep him trapped in the home and that he gives me all the notice he can (usually 1-3 days) because his friends are spontaneous. I argued that it wasn't fair to be left alone on little notice for days at a time but believes he gives me all the notice he can and I shouldn't stop him from seeing friends and family.
.I am working the late shift (finishing around 1am) this weekend which he feels is a perfect excuse to go and see friends as I wont be home majority of the time or sleeping in late which while I understand he is not considering how often he is gone and He claims i want to lock him in the flat while I work or sleep simply to have him close by. But I feel like any scrap of time I can possibly spend with him is better than him being away for another 2 nights
I have absolutely no problem with him visiting friends and family but it feels like he is gone more often than he is home and im abandoned alot. When he is home we dont go out very often unless I plan something and sit home and watch TV. While he plans trips which friends and loved ones constantly
Am I controlling for not wanting to be left alone so often?