I’m not usually on Reddit, but I know this is a good place to seek advice. I (17M) hang out in a group with three girls and two other guys. We’re all very close and hang out pretty much every weekend.
The other weekend, a girl (17F) who we'll call Kayla and I made out after going to the lake with the group. I genuinely really like this girl; every time I'm around her, I feel anxious and my stomach flutters nonstop. Afterward, we hung out, got food, and cuddled.
I texted her about it the next day and she said she wanted it to be a one-time thing and that she only really did it because she was "out of it." Understandable; however, her best friend (who is also a mutual friend) told me she thinks I'm really cute, and Kayla apparently told her that she is actually starting to like me. The problem is, I've talked to Kayla about "us" before and she knows I want something serious.
After we hung out recently, she texted me, "I had a good time today." I replied, "Me too." I waited a few hours and messaged her, "I think we should talk about what happened. Was that a one-time thing? Is it something you want to keep happening?" She responded, "I think it was just a one-time thing. I was really out of it and just had too much, so I wasn't thinking straight."
I left it alone, but yesterday we all hung out again. Everyone left to go get food for about 30 minutes while me and Kayla kept our spot. We were just listening to music and having a very genuine conversation, laughing and smiling. I ended up putting my arm around her and we were being physical (cuddling/closeness), nothing more. This continued throughout the night, so I can't tell if she likes me or not.
Today, I learned she is going on a "two-man" (double date) with our mutual female friend. This absolutely crushed me. While driving home from the store, I genuinely broke down in tears. This has never happened to me before—I’ve never cried over a girl. It wasn't just a few tears, it was a full-on sob. I don't know if it was because of the rain, the stress I’ve had built up, or just total disappointment, but I feel like garbage. I think it’s because it feels like she’s just not ready for a relationship with ME.
She knows I like her a lot. She says things like, "I care about you," and "I'm not looking for anything, and I know I can't commit to something serious out of respect for myself and the other person." Most of my friends keep telling me she's just not ready for a relationship. I’m struggling with all these mixed signals and I’m hoping to get some outside perspectives. What should I do?