Gone through a lot of pointless rants on multiple burner accounts. I hope this is the last one I get to write. I'll try to keep this short.
I'm 19, got this baccalaureate exam coming up in about 2 months, been focusing on studying since the start of this school year.
Did a lot of journaling over the past 2 years, tried my best to write every day. Sadly, out of ignorance and lack of attention, I would forget to write for about 2-3 weeks before getting back at it, so there's some gaps.
One thing I realized is that I'm overly absorbed with myself and this is something I need to research more so I can break out of it.
It just sounds so stupid to say, but I just struggle so much with writing something that isn't about me or having a conversation without some sort of reference from my own experiences.
I try my best to be conscious about it.
Just using the word "I" makes me feel guilty.
I hate how I have these stories or this information about the things I'm good at, it's just that if I get it mentioned, it always comes from my selfish perspective.
I need to stop thinking that I'm special.
There have been over 100 billion humans who walked this earth. History remembered only a couple thousand of them.
Who the hell am I to think like this?